How family therapy can be adapted to young adults (17-25 years) with anorexia. Reporting on work by Lock, Le Grange and others working in Family-Based Treatment (FBT/Maudsley)
Best-selling books like to give readers acronyms to help them remember 5 steps to fix everything in their life. Personally, when I’m frazzled, I can’t remember that much, so I’m offering you just two letters. They won’t make the sun shine 24/7, but they can transform how you relate to whatever weather comes your way.
In this post I offer you three evidence-based approaches to address the effect of traumas large and small, including post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
Our lives, as we support a child with an eating disorder, is peppered with distressing or fearful events — some affect us for a day, and some can bring us to tears, or invade our sleep, even when all is well again. It’s not uncommon for parents to report PTSD.
Our children too accumulate traumas: there’s the eating, the delusional states, the treatment centres, the suicidality, the sense of being utterly alone and misunderstood, and the terrible fights with parents and siblings.
Some traumas stick and lead to post-traumatic stress. Others make us grow and lead to post-traumatic growth.
How can we transform the things that deeply shocked our word into wisdom, gratitude, expansion? Or, less ambitiously, how can we stop being reacting disproportionately to the slightest trigger?
Today, I am summarising some statistics for you.
Each of these statistics represents someone who might be enjoying a full life right now if they had received early diagnosis and evidence-based treatment. I sincerely hope that in ten years’ time the statistics will be very different.
The suicide risk is several times higher among those with an eating disorder.
The following eye-catching charts say it all.
A fair share of the horror stories I hear come from England. So how wonderful is it that NHS England has issued the most well-informed, high-standard instructions we could wish for.
And no wonder. It was written by some of our top experts. And it is actually now government policy!
It’s all in a 102-page document entitled “Access and Waiting Time Standard for Children and Young People with an Eating Disorder. Commissioning Guide” which I’ll summarise for you here in plain language. This is truly great stuff AND there’s money behind it too.
For those of us not in England, this is a model worth copying.
A common source of discouragement from parents is this: “I know I should be kind, and calm, and confident, and compassionate, but so many times I just can’t.”
Well, that’s us just being human. This extreme parenting thing can’t be done 100% all the time, and it certainly can’t be done on our own through sheer willpower. We need fuelling for ourselves. We need compassion and understanding and hand-holding.
My book gives you the why and the how of compassion. My new audio resources help you actually experience the power that lies with a compassionate state, so you can shift yourself into a state closer to wellbeing.
I’ve made changes to Chapter 13 – the one with the compassionate communication tools.
I’ve learned so much more about addressing feelings, about making good use of the body, and about making self-compassion work. It’s all in there.
Do check out the links I provide: I point you to some fantastic resources on the web, and in books.
Some of them could soothe you and sustain you, a little bit at a time, every day.
In this post I asked people for comments on a new cover. This new cover is now out.
Video resources I have found very helpful to build me up fast when I’ve been knocked down. Later I developed my own resources (available on this website), especially for parents in our situation.
Thanks to the many contributors to my book.